Thursday, December 29, 2016

Final review of '8 Keys to Forgiveness' by Robert Enright

As I mentioned in a previous post, I think that the topic of forgiveness is so very important both in mental health, but also for a grander version of world peace.  Imagine if the Israelis and Palestinians could forgive each other (in fact, there are people working on that.  Click here for more information)! 

In general, I will say that I liked, but did not love this book.  I had to work at reading it, more than I usually do.  When I read self-help books, I try and apply them to my own life, and perhaps it is because there isn’t really anyone in my life right now that I need to forgive, that I found the book did not sustain my attention very well.  If you would like to check out a copy for yourself, click here.

Pros to this book:

11)  The writing is simple and easy to understand.
22)  The author writes in a way that lets you know he has a lot of clinical experience working with  forgiveness in his clients.  If I was focusing on forgiveness now, in my life, I think I would want him  as my therapist.
33)  His case studies and examples are very compelling  and mostly relatable.  I think it would be hard for  someone to read this book and not relate to some of  the people in it.
44)  I like that he has a chapter devoted to self-  forgiveness since the ability to see oneself as  imperfect, yet whole, is entirely related to ones’  ability to forgive the same imperfection in others.


Cons to this book:

11)   I know there is a good amount of research about       the benefits of forgiveness.  The author really does     not present much of it, which left me wanting.
22)   I did not find this book to be very helpful, from the   standpoint of a therapist looking to learn something   about implementing forgiveness work into their         own practice
33)  While I know that it is ‘gimmicky’ to have a set up steps, I found myself wishing that the author had   actual exercises/worksheets.  Most of his tools are really just ‘things to think about’ or journal about   which I found harder to translate into action than, for example, some of the things in the recent           Seligman book I read.  I found myself wanting something more concrete.

I have on my list now, to read something by Everett Worthington, another psychologist and author who writes about forgiveness, whom I think I might enjoy more.

Wednesday, December 28, 2016

RIP Rebel Princess for reducing mental health stigma

Carrie Fisher in her iconic role as Princess Leia
RIP Carrie Fisher, the openly Bipolar, addicted actress who brought us one of Hollywood’s first, strong female role models in her portrayal of Princess Leia in the Star Wars series.  She was only 60, when she died.  In her books, she chronicles her struggles with mental illness and addiction.  I write about her, because the Star Wars series has figured prominently into my life (I was 11 years old when the first one came out, and I still can remember standing in the long line, waiting to get tickets for it with my family), and because she was one of the first famous people who talked openly about her struggles with mental health issues.    

Mental health stigma is still a problem in today’s society.  Though the same judgement is usually not prevalent with physical health problems (imagine if someone was ashamed to get treatment for a broken leg), people who seek the help of a therapist are sometimes seen as weak and in part, to blame for their troubles.  This prevents some individuals from seeking help and even can lead to poorer treatment outcomes.  See more about this through Psychology Today, here.


Carrie Fisher was brave in her open discussion of her mental health troubles.  She was a rebel leader in film, as in her life.  Rest in peace.

Friday, December 23, 2016

Final Review of 'Authentic Happiness' by Martin Seligman


I finished reading Seligman’s ‘Authentic Happiness’.  Overall, I quite enjoyed it and it was a good reminder for the coming New Year, to take stock of one's strengths, and to design a good life for oneself.  I think that many of us in the Western World are lucky in that we no longer have to expend energy on basic survival; instead, this book reminds us that we can construct a pleasant, meaningful and related existence.

Here are some pros and cons of the book, as I see them:

Pros:

1)  A good deal of data is presented. For those of us who are science minded, Seligman does not as us just to ‘trust him’ but ge also presents us with a mountain of empirical evidence to support his claims. There are a few places in the book where he is clear that his recommendations are based on speculation and NOT data, and I think that’s smart.  As a scholar, I still am interested in his informed opinion, even if there is no research, to-date, backing a specific claim.

2) The book is very practical.  There are times when he directs you to a website where you can take free questionnaires to determined your strengths and attachment style, for example.  You can generate your own unique happiness formula and come away from this book with some concrete ideas about how to live your life differently.

3) The book assumes the reader is relatively bright;  Seligman’s style of writing is not overly simple or overly complex. I think that a clinician or researcher could get something out of this book (I did) but so could a lay-person.

4) The book has broad application; Seligman he addresses happiness in many facets of life, including marriage and parenting.

Cons: 

1) The book unnecessarily demeans and oversimplifies psychodynamic theory;  There are a number of times where Seligman denigrates dynamic (Freudian) theory, in his book.  I understand why he does this:  psychology has evolved over the years and there may be some benefits to the reader in contrasting old ways of thinking about happiness and positivity to new ways of thinking.  However, there are contemporary versions of dynamic therapy that have empirical backing and I worry about the reader who has a dynamic therapist and becomes convinced that their therapist’s orientation is faulty.

2) The book fails to address diversity (i.e., is the research applicable to everyone regardless the gender, race, and sexual orientation?).  I teach sexuality classes to undergraduates and also, in my practice, see quite a few LGBT clients.  If I try to read the book with their eyes, it seems as if it excludes a lot of ways of being, in the world.  On one hand, Seligman gives a good many personal anecdotes about his marriage and raising his children that make him seem human, However, these personal anecdotes end up sounding overly male and Caucasian, in my opinion.  I respect that Seligman IS a white male, but I think he could do more to both talk about the data’s shortcomings with other populations and also to try and include other populations in his book.


Overall, I will be recommending this book to some of my clients.  I particularly think it’s a great book for the New Year.  It can be ordered here through Amazon UK's website.

Sunday, December 18, 2016

Second book of the month-- 'Authentic Happiness' by Martin Seligman

When I went to graduate school in 1988, we were educated in psychological testing, statistics and research design, and psychopathology.  At the heart of psychology was the treatment of psychological ills and the removal of suffering.  Since that time, there has been an emergence in the field of ‘Positive Psychology’—psychology that is strength based and focuses on promoting happiness, as opposed to relieving suffering.  My other book that I will be reviewing at the end of the break is Martin Seligman’s ‘Authentic Happiness’.   You can buy it from Amazon UK, here.

So far, what I like about this book is that it is 100 percent based in scientific evidence. Seligman doesn’t just tell you what to do, to have a happier life and expect you to simply trust him.  He walks you through the research that exists on each of the components of happiness and convinces you with DATA.  He also has a website that goes with the book so you can take some of the questionnaires he refers to, within the book.


Once I am finished, I will give you the full scoop.

Thursday, December 15, 2016

Some light reading for the holidays

So occasionally I read and review a self-help book to use in my practice.  Feel free to read along with me if you would like. 

The one I have been recently reading is about forgiveness.  It’s called “8 Keys to Forgiveness” by Robert Enright, and can be found here on Amazon.  It’s available as a kindle book, as well.  Before I bought it, I specifically looked for something that was not spiritual in nature.  In my initial search, I found that many books written about forgiveness have a spiritual or religious focus. While I think that spirituality can be an important component in many peoples’ wellness, I am biased toward Western Medicine.  I knew that there was a good deal of research available about the health benefits of forgiveness, so I looked for that. 

Many of my clients have past abuses or hurts that they are working to understand and heal.  Sometimes those hurts were perpetrated by a parent. I am of the firm belief that typically, ‘parentectomies’ aren’t very helpful for people.  While some might need interpersonal distance from close family members to heal from a past hurt, or to protect themselves from current ones, portraying the perpetrator (especially if it is a family member or loved one) as ‘all bad’ promotes black and white thinking that is not helpful to people in the long run.

On the other hand, asking someone who has been seriously injured by another to ‘forgive’ is no small matter.  It takes time, and work, and patience.   At times, it even seems disastrous to tell someone who has recently experienced a severe injury to start a process toward forgiveness.


Let’s see what’s inside the book…

Sunday, November 6, 2016

Keeping your marriage intimate

I have a lot of couples that come into my office looking for tips.  This article is a decent one with some very practical suggestions.  Enjoy.

Date Night

Sunday, October 23, 2016

How much 'stuff' does one need, to be fulfilled?

I ran across this article the other day, and now am looking forward to seeing the movie.  It's about a man who, following a relationship break-up, decides to give up his worldly possessions.  He films the process, for a year, and creates a documentary.  Here is a link to the article:  documentary about giving up ones' possessions
One example of a tiny house


When I moved to Denmark four years ago, I originally decided that I was going to bring most of my belongings.  However, when I looked at some quotes for moving expenses, it became clear that it was entirely cost prohibitive.  Most people who move their belongings (i..e., furniture) overseas are either wealthy or have a company paying for the move.  It dawned on me that I was really going to have to be selective about what I brought over here, from the States.  Week, after week, I got rid of things.  They were either sold on Craigslist (the American version of Den BlÃ¥ Avis), given away, recycled, or thrown away. What followed was a deep sense of relief; even without my belongings (including a car, which I sold), I could be and would be just fine.

I became interested in the tiny house movement, and, to this day, my retirement plans are to live tiny, half time, somewhere in the US desert.

Feel free to share your thoughts about how owning 'stuff' relates, or doesn't relate to happiness. Enjoy the attached article.

Tuesday, October 18, 2016

When your partner comes from another country...

Many of my clients are non-Danes married to Danes.  Here is a fun and insightful article about choosing to marry someone from a different culture.
New York Times article-- foreign spouse

Sunday, October 2, 2016

Coping with the sexual side effects of antidepressant medication

I remember when Prozac first came out, in the late 1980s.  It was marketed as a kind of miracle cure for depression, and was considered a preferable alternative to the then MAO-inhibitors and Tricyclics that were being prescribed at the time.  Prozac was marketed as having almost no side-effects, which was in stark contrast to the available drugs for treating mood disorders. Soon after doctors started prescribing Prozac,  we began to get complaints from patients about their ability to orgasm and sometimes their ability to experience sexual desire.  We were so enamored with this miracle drug that I think we often were unempathetic to our clients' concerns because, wouldn't everyone rather feel happy than be able to have an orgasm?  Since then, our notions about the importance of sexuality have evolved.  Also, the number of SSRIs on the market has increased and some atypical antidepressants (i.e., Wellbutrin) have been introduced that have been shown to be effective.  Clients who have sexual side-effects on one medication can be tried on a variety of medications until they find one that helps them but produces the least number of side-effects
.
I want to mention however, that while I sympathize with people who have sexual side effects, it is nearly always helpful for individuals to attempt to define sex in the broadest possible manner.  When one defines sex in the most heteronormative (i.e., penile-vaginal, penetrative, leading to orgasm) fashion, it can create unrealistic expectations.  Many of us will, at some point in our life, be on a medication that affects our sex drive, become disabled, and/or we will ALL age.  Our ability to be broad minded and adventurous regarding sex will help us have healthy sexual lives throughout the years to come, no matter the condition of our biology and body.

Here's a helpful article about this topic from buzzfeed: Click here


Friday, September 23, 2016

Another article about authentic self

Several famous psychologists have written about the existence of an 'authentic self'.  Notably, Carl Rogers used this term as marker for when one has achieved psychological health.  Donald Winnicott also spoke of the 'true self/false self' dilemma.  He believed that 'true self' actually produces a feeling for people-- a sense of rightness, or 'this is me'.  Something about this notion has always attracted me, both as a person and as a psychologist.  Many of my overachieving clients seem to be struggling with being themselves, in a world replete with social norms and customs that can feel impossible to meet.  In Denmark, the pressure for a couple (straight, gay or otherwise) to have a baby in their thirties, complete with a monster-pram, is something that I have noticed taking a toll on many people in my practice.  I'm sure you can think of many unspoken rules and norms in society that also pressure people to be someone other than their authentic self.

I ran across the following article that looks at modern day pressures young people face.  Enjoy.
False Self Syndrome

Wednesday, September 21, 2016

Predicting suicidality using technology

For a long time, researchers knocked Freud's idea of the unconscious because it could not be 'proven'.  However, today, technology makes it possibly for us to quantifiably measure response time to certain associations as a way to determine biases about which a person might not be 100 percent conscious.  A test has been created to examine just this phenomenon.  It's called the Implicit Associations Test and it was developed at Harvard.   Click here to take it and get a better understanding of how it works.

Scientists have developed similar measures to determine if one is suicidal.  Frequently, suicidal people won't admit to being suicidal and thus this kind of measure is very important.  I ran across this article today and thought I would share it, here.  Some of you know that I am an huge techno geek, and applications such as the one described in this article are one way in which technological innovation can be used with psychiatric patients.

http://www.pbs.org/newshour/bb/can-technology-help-predict-will-attempt-suicide/

The presence of dogs in the therapy office

Esther
A couple of years ago, we purchased a beagle mix from a nearby kennel.  After reading a lot of information about therapy dogs, I decided to see what kinds of programs were available in English, in Denmark.  I was unable to find anything so I read up about the mere presence of animals in the therapy session.  Not surprisingly, there is a wealth of data about the calming effects of animals.  With the goal of bringing 'Esther' to work, I began training her.  I also took here everywhere-- trains, busses, and my classroom where I teach.   My goal was to get her acclimated to many different sounds, sights, and types of people.  Today, at 2-years old, she is a surprisingly calm dog, and I have ventured into bringing her into the therapy office.  My clients have, for the most part, been appreciative.

Feel free to say how you would feel if there was a dog in your therapy!

Here is a link from someone who researcher this exact issue.  Enjoy!

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/decoding-your-pet/201501/what-if-your-therapist-had-dog-in-the-office

For those suffering from anxiety...

Most people have suffered from stress and anxiety, at some point in their lives.  I ran across this article today and decided to share it.



http://www.latina.com/lifestyle/health/anxiety-facts-symptoms

Wednesday, May 18, 2016

When OCD takes a sexual form


Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, commonly known as OCD, can be extremely debilitating.  About two percent of adults suffer from this disorder.  In popular media and culture, OCD is often represented as manifesting itself as excessive hand-washing and concern with tidiness.  However, it can also manifest itself in other ways, as is demonstrated in this article and video.

http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/video/2016/apr/27/my-sexual-thoughts-drove-me-mad-then-i-realised-it-was-ocd-video?CMP=share_btn_fb


Saturday, January 30, 2016

New Evidence suggests that Freudian-style Dynamic Psychotherapy is more effective than CBT

For those of you who are interested in therapy-outcomes research, there is some new information about the effectiveness of dynamic psychotherapy versus cognitive behavioral therapy.  I was really encouraged by this article since I tend to practice a mix of the two.

https://www.theguardian.com/science/2016/jan/07/therapy-wars-revenge-of-freud-cognitive-behavioural-therapy

Fighting every day Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)

Did you know that getting a song stuck in one's head is one of the most common symptoms of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder?  Here's some practical advice, from the research, for getting that tune out of your head?

A number of Beatles songs have been shown to be among the most annoyingly easy to become obsessive about.  Read this article for more information.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/science/science-news/9950143/Get-that-tune-out-of-your-head-scientists-find-how-to-get-rid-of-earworms.html